well...well...well. Nothing I say in the following review could possibly sum up just how much I hate this movie. Nothing. Some of you out there may remember the destruction of the Robocop franchise which followed with a television series and a mini-series both of which failed to be anything like the original two films. Anyway this isn't about that but I just thought I'd point out how this film effectively sent the franchise to hell leading even to Robocop appearing in the WWF (who says wrestling is fake). Right well without further stalling I better explain the plot...If you could call it that.
Basically the film follows the trend of civil unrest that first two films played on, being that the company OCP (Omni Consumer Products) is now facing an army of pissed off homeless-ish people. Basically the company try to relocate some people in order to build Delta City but those impoverished people don't want to be moved. So for no real apparent reason OCP create a special task force known as Rehabs to deal with the problem under the leadership of our antagonist Paul McDagget. Also we are made aware that OCP is now being controlled by some Japanese company who supply a robot to help deal with the poor people as well.
So well okay makes sense...some robots to obviously fight Robocop later in the film, I'm cool with that. At least I would be if the robots were not ninjas. Ninja robots that look exactly humans. Ugh. What kind of retarded company would invest money in building Ninja Robots? What kind of market could there possibly be for that? Anyway Robocop helps some of the OCP resistance but is prevented by a magical fourth prime directive. Lewis from the first films is killed off and Robocop goes into hiding with the resistance. Robocop's efficiency levels begin to drop and is taken to the resistance base where we find Dr. Lazarus. They begin to fix the Murphy and then somehow he is able to delete the forth prime directive. Um ok...that really would have been helpful in the first film...and the second. So now the resistance finds a kick ass jetpack designed for Robocop while he shares some bonding time with a small child. Robocop heads down to the police station and uses a kick ass hand-gun-missile-flamethrower to burn down the Rehabs base. Then we get Robocop riding in a pimp-mobile, chasing McDaggett. yep. Finally when some action happens...and we get this. Anyway some pissed off guy tells McDaggett where the resistance base is and the rehabs go in and either kill or capture most of the resistance. Robocop arrives back at the now empty base and is confronted by...JAPANESE NINJA ROBOT! a pretty crap fight ensues and basically the robot's gets all explodey. However Robocop looses a hand and again replaces it with the gun-flamethrower thing. Then in a move of defiance, the police decide to side wit
h the resistance and fight against OCP. Hmm what ever will they do now to fight the resistance? HIRE PUNKS! That's right an army of punks comes rolling into help fight against the resistance. And somehow...I'm guessing because the punks have been given tanks...they are winning. But then Robocop shows up with his kick-ass jetpack and missile hand, blowing everything up. You can watch the whole scene here. So Robo flys to the OCP building, deciding to smash through the control room window. McDaggett brings in two more otomo ninja bots but a little girl hacks them with a computer making them kill each other. McDaggett reveals that the robots are rigged with a self-destruct and will explode in seconds, Robocop jumps into his jetpack and flys away with the little girl and Dr. Lazuraus while the building explodes. That's it..that's as far as I'm going with this.If you don't understand by now just how stupid and silly this movie is then maybe you should leave right now. This film is the antithesis of what the original "Robocop" was about...corporate greed, media and consumer satire and very over the top violence. Here we just get robot ninjas and pimp-mobiles. See someone decided that the franchise should be aimed at children and rather than hold the hard R +18 ratings of the previous films, drop down to M+15. And that's just the first issue, I mean sure you could probably have a decent M rated film...it might not be as gory but maybe it will work. Ok well how about the fact that the jetpack and gun-hand are purely introduced as a way to sell new robocop action figures. I know because 4 year old me bought that damn action figure. And the role playing dress up gun-arm. Anyway the second problem this movie faces before you even press play is the knowledge that Peter Weller (The actor to play Murphy in 1 and 2) was absent from this so he could go star in movie about talking typewriters. Robert Burke does try very hard in the role but seems to blend in with the suit, not being able to convey
and real humanity from the cyborg. Then we get to the main big bad enemy robot that was in each film, first being ED-209...then Robo-Cain. Logic would suggest that this film would have an even bigger, badder robot then that but...no we get the damn robot ninjas who are about as intimidating as a robot puppy. What the hell were they thinking here. Then there is also the stupid add on of the child computer wiz who befriends Robocop and really unless your movie is "Kick-ass" you really shouldn't have a child character. I'm gonna end this here I could rant on and on about how bad this film is because it really is that bad. Then again it must be said that the studio, Orion was going though massive financial troubles at the time and....ah screw this. they still made a bad movie.
1 star out of a hundred.
Stay tuned.
Be Seeing You
Also I'd like to add again this is the second movie I've reviewed where by someone has used a bomb against an enemy who can fly. Idiots!
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